Moving Day

Please come see me at my new home:

http://hotfessional.com

Don't forget to change your reader feeds.

---- Wine and whine continues in my new home. Join me and I'll make sure your glass stays full. ----

Random Crappola

I spent most of the day putting up the tree. It looks crooked. (It's artificial, how the hell can it be crooked?) I'm waiting for the cats to decide to climb up it. I'm waiting for Mr. Hot to bring me a 7&7. I'm waiting for Shortman to come downstairs so I can ask him to bring me my slippers. Snort.

I've been working on my resume today. A friend of mine is a Human Resources director and they have a position open that she thinks is perfect for me. Her boyfriend (who I used to work for) thinks it's perfect for me. She made me promise to send her my non-fuckin'-existent resume. Could I tell her that if I sent it to her today, it would be a blank document? No. I would have liked to, but she would have ripped me a new ass. From 300 miles away. Because she's been after me to do it for the past 4 years. So, I sucked it up, told her I'd send it as soon as possible, and started writing it. Gawd that's sad. I've known for nearly a year that I was going to be looking for a new job, I used to work in H.R., and I still haven't started it. I'm obviously so damned far in denial that I can't think straight. And lazy, to boot.

So, I'm working on it. But I think I'm going to give it up for tonight. If I have to think of one more way to say "responsible for" or "accountable for" or "managed" or "ensured", I'm going to stick my head through something. Possibly the wall. Possibly the mirror that is now decked with blue and green tinsel and little stars and crocheted snowflakes.

I ordered "my Christmas present" - a Canon printer/scanner. We had Mr. Hot's famous turkey burgers for dinner. I vacuumed the living room after the tree (artificial, remember?) shed a shitload of plastic needles all over the place. MomandDad are coming over tomorrow, and the girl cat is attacking the Santa Claus on the tree skirt. The boy cat already carried off one of the sheep from the manger. College basketball is on television, and I opted for a vodka/limeade instead of a 7&7.

---- Tomorrow I will work on the freakin' resume some more, (I'm going to have it finished by Monday) and write Christmas cards. And do more on my move to Wordpress. You all keep me honest, eh? ----

I Do This To Myself

With all the Blogger hoopla, and my own desire to change things up a bit, I've been working on moving this site over to Wordpress.

Is it driving me ape-shit-freakin'-nuts-crazy? Um, oh. yes. Mostly because it's an entirely new way of thinking. It's not all "draggy/droppy" and "clicky-wicky". And when you're used to something, it's comfortable. When you're trying something new, even when you know it will be better, it makes you kinda hornery.

(No, not horny, people. Hornery. Y'know, what all y'all say down there in the south. Not the north where I'm sitting looking out the gray windows to the grayer sky and where it was 9 damn degrees when I got up this morning, and the suck-ass snow is not going to melt until June?)

Aaaaanyway.

Could y'all go take a look? I'm still playing around, and I know there's probably errors and crap, but I need some other eyes besides my half-blind ones to catch them. It's RIGHT HERE.

Comment there, or here, it doesn't matter. I'm not going to be ready to switch over "permanently" until I get it figured out. I don't have the other site linked to Google or any other Search engines.

---- Also, any Wordpress hints would be appreciated. You'll get my eternal thanks and I'll link you in a post and probably lick you next time I see you. ----

Boy George Says HI!

Karma.

(Karma karma karma karma karma chameleon,
you come and go, you come and go.
Loving would be easy if your colors were like my dreams,
red gold and green, red gold and green.)

I've seen the mention of Karma in a couple of different blogs today. Do I believe in Karma? You bet your sweet little butt I do. Karma is when the car that blasted past me in the right lane doing 15 miles over the speed limit is pulled over by a state trooper a few miles up the road. Karma is when the person behind me in the grocery lane zips into a newly opened lane (even though the cashier asks for "the next person in line") just to get stuck waiting for a price check. Hee! That's always fun.

Last night, I finally got my own Karma for years and years of O'Horror flight delays.



Tuesday and yesterday, the suck ass snow hit Chicago. It started Tuesday evening, and by 8 pm, it was really coming down. (I know, I was freakin' walking back from a mexican restaurant in it.)

When I woke up yesterday morning, the ground was covered, but the streets had melted (well, not the streets, themselves, but...shut.up.). There was snow on the rooftops (which you can see when you're on the 28th floor!), but traffic seemed to be moving okay, and most importantly? There were taxis that were willing to stop for me. (Scoff if you must, but this isn't always the case when you're dragging a suitcase in bad weather - even though I was only going to the office.)

I checked the American Airlines website as soon as I got logged on. According to it, we were still scheduled to leave at 6:30 p.m. (I'm such a sucker. I actually checked 10 hours before scheduled departure time to see if we were delayed. Snirk. Like they're going to fuckin' post that.) The Federal Aviation Administration site showed incoming delays of 3 hours and increasing for O'Horror. But! Only 45 minute delays for outgoing flights.

(Now, I'm by no means a rocket scientist or air traffic controller, but I'm guessing that eventually? If incoming flights are delayed by 3 hours? They're going to run out of planes. Y'know? To go out? Because last time I checked, there's not an overabundance of extra planes laying around Chicago. But, who am I to say? Maybe there are and someone is just hiding them. In the Air & Space Museum? In the basement of the Sears Tower? Under Lake Michigan?)

Aaaaaanyway, I went to my morning meetings, and then met my friend the Logistics Goddess for lunch. As we were sitting there, (her stuffing her skinny little 27-year-old-face with a ginormous piece of chocolate cake with mint frosting, and me sipping my green tea feeling my hips grow just looking at her damn cake), the skies once again let loose with that wet, white crap. Damnity, damn, damn, damn. Another check of the American site tells me, "Yep! Still on time. What are you worried about?!" (sucker)

(I know, I have "sucker" tattooed on my forehead. Must cut bangs so tattoo stays hidden.)

At 2:00, the snow stops and the sky turns that brilliant shade of blue that says, in Midwesternese, "It's about 12 below out here. But you need sun, so come stand outside for 2.3 seconds and try to soak it up because it's going to be cloudy, for, oh, about the next 17 weeks."

At this point, I decide to make my getaway. It's 2:30. Four hours 'til departure. (So says the American site). I say goodbye and Happy Holidays to everyone. I get a cab and make excellent time to O'Horror. Like, 35 minutes! Door to door.

Except, at the 25 minute mark? I get a Crackberry message from American. "Flight 510 ORD to DTW NOW 8:15 p.m."

Sucker. First notification of a 105 minute delay.

You're waiting for the Karma part, right? Well, I'm getting there.

As I get through security, I take a look at the departure board to see which gate I'm scheduled to leave from (yea, like they won't change it 12 times in the next 5 hours) and I pray that there's a bar near it.

Wait, what's that? Right above that big "Delayed - Now 8:15" lettering next to Flight 510 - Detroit? A 5:05 pm flight? to Detroit? That's listed as being "On Time"? And leaving from the gate I'm standing in front of?

Well, well, well. You just know that I dragged me and my Staypuft-marshmallow-coat-covered hotness over to the desk and asked about getting on standby. The nice gate attendant gave me a standby card told me to make sure I checked for gate changes before boarding time.

Boarding time? 4:35. Current time? 3:09. Across from the gate? Macaroni Grill. Wine!

To spare you any additional boredom, er, hitting yourself in the head with your keyboard, er, angst, I will tell you that yes! I did get my standby seat (on an 17 1/2 row, 70 seat plane). We landed at 6:25 pm Central time. Which was 5 minutes before my original flight was even scheduled to take off.

The original flight? Left O'Horror at 8:50 pm. Which would have put my in my front door around 11 pm Eastern. Instead, at 11 pm, I was snuggled in my nice warm flannel sheets. Fast, fast, asleep.

---- That, my friends, is Karma. I hope you get your dose of good Karma today. ----

Interesting Article

My darlin' friends,

'Tis the Season to be credit aware.

Love,
Hotfessional

Deck the Halls

So, I'm seriously considering moving to Wordpress in 2008, which means I don't want to spend a ton of time to redecorate here.... but - I do want to give you all an opportunity to win prizes in an anti-contest. And to do that, I need to make some effort at sprucing this place up for the holiday season.

As you know, I'm hopeless at real, live trees. So, I put up a silver, aluminum tree. And, like my great-grandmother, I have one of those rotating disk lamps that I shine on it. (Oh mah gawd people. Does anyone else remember those? I'm trying to find an image on GoogleImages, and can't find one. Am I that freakin' old?)

I like it. It's simple. Unassuming. Like me. (snirk. snort.)

Aaaanywaaaaay. Go check it out:



All of the anti-rules and anti-prizes are listed.

---- A simple picture and a link will get you entered. The anti-contest ends December 10th, so get it in gear y'all. ----

Hot Llama

Wait, that's not that what they're saying in the B-52's song? Damn. Are you sure?

Well, it's okay, because witchypoo (with a small "w", thankyouverymuch) gave me my own little hot llama.


Simply Curious created this award. (Be careful if you open her link at work. Make sure no one is standing behind you!) So thank you Simply.

The instructions for this is kind of meme-ish, because you scoop the image, reference the creator, and the giver, and go decorate someone else’s house when you are done.

So, I'm decorating. Here's who I'm awarding:

• Magneto Bold
• Anonymous Boxer
• a happier girl
• The Queen of Drama

---- Love you guys. You do keep me laughing. Now, I'm going to go play with my template some. I'm getting bored. And that's never a good thing. ----

November Perfect Post

One of my favorite things to do is to lose myself in Meghan's photography. Her little boy makes my heart squeeze, he's so cute. If you don't know about Pyreflies Over Zanarkind, you must go take a look. Grab some coffee and something sweet to go with it and page through her archives. Her photography speaks to me in so many ways. (And yes, she knows I stalk her!)

This post here is just beautiful. The third photo reminds me of the days when Shortman was Xan's age - and they could be brothers from the back. I want to jump through the monitor and pick him up and swing him around doing airplanes. That was my baby's favorite thing.

Because I've been remembering so much about those days with all my new bloggy friends who have little ones, and that picture summed everything up, I'm awarding Meghan with the Perfect Post November 2007 award. (And now she's pregnant with #2, so we'll have newborn pictures to look at next year!)



Meghan, check your email for your badge!

---- And, as always, thanks to Kimberly and Lindsay for creating the Monthly Perfect Posts. If you'd like the opportunity to award your favorite blogger with a nifty little badge for their 'perfect post', take a stroll over to Petroville.com and Suburban Turmoil. They'll tell you all about it. ----

Dear Santa

Hey, y'all. I have a question. I'm trying to make my Christmas list. (Please Santa? I've been a very, very good girl this year. Yea, I know I made fun of you to the whole internet when you dropped that $25 bottle of vodka on the garage floor, but even you kinda laughed. Remember? I promise I'll make up for it - with, um, y'know.....cookies!)

So, I have two items on my list. But I need your advice.

1. 
   I want a straight iron. With my new, improved, non-gray hair and cute cut, (which I've already spent more money on since October than in the previous 4 years combined for Gawd's sake), I'd really like to have more "options" than just blowing it dry and walking out of the house. My hair is naturally wavy/curly, but when I dry it, it gets a little frizzy. I want something that will help keep the frizz out. I'm thinking that a big-barrelled curling iron may even help, but, the last curling iron I had was about $14.95. I'm thinking that's probably not the best option now. So, all of you hotties? Tell me. (So I can tell Santa.) What do you suggest? Brand/model?


2. 
   My next item (and really, the one I want more) is a scanner. Right now, we have a Canon 330 inkjet and an HP Photoprinter. The Canon is great for homework and stuff, the HP sucks ink like I suck, um,...popsicles. In the interest of space, I'm leaning towards getting a combo printer/scanner/copier (I have no phone line, so a fax machine? won't get used). If I had a scanner, I can share some Hotfessional as a youngster pictures. I know you want that. (Shhhh. Be nice. Stop making those faces.) So, again, any suggestions?
   

Thank you my friends. I know I can count on you.

---

The Bowl Selection Show for NCAA football is on. My stepdaughter, 20, will be going to the Fiesta Bowl with the WVU Mountainqueers (she's in the colorguard). Ohio State and LSU will be playing in the Championship game. Is it wrong to admit that I danced around the living room last night when Pitt beat (BEAT!) WVU? Well, too bad if it is. I did.

---

In other news, I'm back to Chicago tomorrow. Well, depending on American Airlines' ability to actually leave Detroit at 7:05 a-freakin'-m tomorrow morning. And their abiity to land at O'Horror at 7:20 a.m. Based on the fact that I can hear the wind howling like a banshee outside the window behind my head? I'll probably be blogging from Gate B8 at Smith Terminal tomorrow for a while. I'm trying to get into my Zen mindset now. Just to be ready.

Also, it's going to be cold. Fucking cold. I have this great full-length down coat (aka "Mom's Chicago coat) - but I feel like the Staypuft Marshmallow Man when I wear it. I don't hardly fit through the damned doorways. And airport security? Bah! "Waddle on through ma'am. Oh, but please, take off the bedspread and put it through the x-ray machine." Granted, I managed to walk 2 1/2 miles while wearing it one night when there was a blizzard while I was there (although the person I was following probably thought I was a stalker). But, hot? Its.so.not. Well, literally, it can be, but y'know, in MY sense of the word? Not so much. Actually, not at all. Oh well. Winter is here again. Damn it. Where is my global warming Al?

---

Okay, Mr. Hot is making noises over there like it's bedtime. And, I guess it should be since I have to get up at 4 a.m. for that fun, fun, fun trip. If you run into this person on the streets of Chicago anytime over the next three days, please make sure to say Hi!


---- And if you don't mention how much is so fashion-don't about my outfit, I will probably lick you. And buy you a drink. ----

December 1st?

Okay, I wasn't going to post today, y'know, after 30-freakin'-days-in-a-row of NaBloPoMo. Thank the sweet Gawd that it wasn't a 31-month day.

But, I'm posting after taking a sip of my third vodka/limeade. (not durnk, drunk but feeling just fine. Okay, maybe well on my way to kind-of-drunk. Or more than slightly drunk.)

The girl cat is laying on my left leg. Poopy-the-Puppy is giving me the evil eye because he is jea-fucking-lous of the cats. But they lurv him. So he's torn. Because they both think he's the cat's meow. Snirk. Sorry. That was way too bad. But they do. And he is.

I am sitting on my couch enjoying my wifeless wireless. (hee. That was an honest typo. Really. Caught it on a re-read.)

And Missouri is losing to Oklahoma 7-6 - Gawd. When is college football going to be finished? The Big-10 was done two weeks ago. Why are the rest stil playing?

Did I mention that Shortman is taking a web authoring class this semester? And that I used to do that for a living (back in the olden days of pure html and an occasional piece of .asp or javascript?) So, I thought this would be an easy class. (Because I actually, at one time, made money doing this). I could help him. I was fucking wrong. I never used framesets (bad style when I started) or cascading style sheets (before my time). Today, I spent 3 damn-it-to-hell-HOURS trying to debug cascading style sheets for a project. This is wrong. In so many ways.

[Damn. Oklahoma just scored. Mr. Hot is commenting on the "corn-fed Oklahoma girls". I think he's lusting after them, The-Other-Ree. Now he's switched to the West Virginia MountainQueers game. And they're losing! Yes!!!!! Sorry for my non-US-college-football-fan readers....but for WVU to lose? is orgasmic. Take my word for it. Even though 20 is part of the color guard. Sworn-mortal-freakin'-enemy. I Am Marshall. Lets.Go.Pitt!]

Anyway. I'm way too amped from debugging 11th grade homework to go to sleep. So, y'all get me - drunk blogging. Sorry.

Mr. Hot and I are sitting on opposite sides of the couch (It's in the favorite things post...it's like 25-feet of separation) - each with a laptop and Shortman is upstairs on the desktop - playing WoW. Can you have an entire family of nerds? We actually have 2 laptops and 3 desktops. I need to get two of the desktops hooked up for wireless. We're a sad bunch. Go ahead. I know you're thinking it.

Mr. Hot is lusting after the Comcast spokeswoman. (That's just an aside.) He does. I let him. (Meaning I don't throw something at him.)

Okay, I'm going back to reading my bloglines. I'll try to be at least more coherent tomorrow. I may tell you about "The King". Who shares my mom and dad. Who is two years younger than me. Who is (gulp) my brother. Did I mention he's two years younger? But is male? And thinks that Male=Superior? Dudes, I'm serious. He's from the Dark Ages. Yea, I need to NOT be durnk drunk when I write that post.

---- Yea, my family. That I didn't marry or give birth to. That's a story. Stay tuned. It's all about weirdness. ----